Thirteen Things #6 - Things I haven't managed to kill, or break...YET!

No, it's true, ask anyone of the service and repair departments currently on my speed dial - my kids and husband Garth (not his real name) WILL tell you - I am a total KLUTZ aaaaaand there's a very good reason why my other blog has the following proviso:

It's no secret. I like getting stuff. I like writing about the stuff that we like and perhaps make my family's life a little easier. Especially, if it works!

Or, I haven't managed to break it...YET!

On the other hand, taking into consideration that I did NOT break the stupid dryer, there are some things that just don't seem to work out right for us.

More specifically, appliances and...well...anything with mechanical and/or moving parts.

Seriously, I have voltage issues which, in turn, increases my chances of having some serious bad luck with electric.  Hell, I managed to set my bra on fire and  kill the dishwasher.  Oh, AND I nearly fried the entire neighborhood, dancing with power tools, again.

[wipes dirt off ass and waves at 98-year-old neighbor]

Hang on.  Don't go.  Fear not, there maybe more to the total DORK you see, before you! I had some time to kill at school, yesterday - my kids make me park way in the back - and I managed to come up with a list of stuff that, you know, still work.

The 13 Things I Have NOT Managed to Break and/or KILL, Yet:

My beloved blow dryer:  I start each and every day working this puppy.  I've had it so long, I don't remember when I bought it, and I believe that blow dryers - sort of like, dogs - begin to take on the characteristics of their human counterparts. It's loyal, works hard and very cheap frugal and I bet you did NOT know that dime store hair dryers could work so well...did you, now...huh!?!?

G.G.'s Table:  My mother-in-law gave us this telephone table.  It belonged to her mother and has got an itty-bitty-chair (gosh, but her butt must have been really, really small) and a desk-type cubby meant for a phone book, I think.  I'm not really sure how old it is.  It sits by the front door, with my favorite lamp and Thing Two's newest snow globe, and is the ONLY place where the flowers from hell will look at least half-decent.  I mean, they haven't bloomed in years.  I don't have very much luck with violets, either.  They mock me, as they are merely mostly dead.

Mr. Dyson's Opus:  What, doesn't everyone name their housekeeping buddies?  Oh, dear Mr. Dyson, how I love this vacuum cleaner.  Raising 4 kids, 2 cats and a big old doofus-type chocolate lab (yes, they do so shed hair all over the place!)  I can't tell you how many of these suckers I've killed.  Because, I seem to have lost count.  A long time ago.  I don't have much luck with buying vacuums, either.  It was a gift from my parents.

G.G.'s Christmas Cactus:  Another gift from my mother-in-law (because, she must really, really like me) this is a cutting from her father's Christmas Cactus and is about a bazillion years old.  It doesn't bloom, either.  But, I don't take it outside when it's warm, like you're supposed to, however, because I do know when NOT to, you know, push my luck.

The Refrigerator:  Yes, it's still running and the very first appliance purchased for the house, when we moved in 15 years ago.  My parents bought this for us, too.  Like me, it's rusty, leaks and a bit squeaky - see blow dryer rule.  Excuse the finger.

 

Creeping Charlie:  Charlie's not very happy with me, at the moment.  Don't know why, though.  He's got the whole corner, to himself.  Honestly, I'm secretly hoping Charlie gives up the ghost.  He IS looking sort of, you know, creepy.

China cabinet filled with pretties from Hungary:  Because, I keep them ALL behind glass and Garth (not his real name) cleans it.  'Nuf said.

Matching China cabinet and even more pretties:  See above.

Sir Fig Newton:  Some of my best childhood memories are from trips visiting family in Hungary and picking fresh figs from my Uncle's tree.  It was HUGE and had a rope swing hanging from one of its branches.  This one, not so much.  I've always wanted a fig tree and finally bought a young plant, last spring.  It's inside, for now.  But, I may just keep it outside next year.  Since, the cat insists on peeing in its pot.  I'll be danged if I'll let anyone ELSE kill it aaaand...HEY...nobody messes with my figs!

The Cookie Jar:  We received this cookie jar as a wedding present, on our wedding day...GULP...nearly 18 years ago.  Yes, it's still in one piece.  Nope, not even a chip.  I'm just as surprised as you are, believe me.  After 4 kids, 2 cats...etc...etc...yep, this little jar has seen a LOT of action!

My Sneakers:  I bought these when The Boy started kindergarten - 4 years ago - and, trust me, they have seen a LOT of mileage.  When doofus-dog sees me putting these puppies on, he knows, it means maybe...just maybe...we are FINALLY going out for a walk!

Speaking of The Doofus-Dog:  He's lucky I haven't killed him, yet.  Permanently attached to my hip, he's always sneaking up on me, making me fall or shoving his tongue down my throat.  Oh, and he eats EVERYTHING, he drives me absolutely crazy and can be  Such a total DORK and...oh, wait.

[see blow dryer rule)

Never mind and NO he doesn't walk very well, either!

These are MY geraniums:  All of these pots are from cuttings off of a plant I received after Thing One was born, 14 years ago. There's an interesting story behind these geraniums.  My father escaped from Hungary when he was 18.  He told his mother that he was going out, to get bread.  My grandmother died, the year after we were born, and my father never saw her again.  Geraniums were my grandmother's favorite flower and she kept pots on her balcony.  Her death nearly destroyed my grandfather and, in turn, he neglected the geraniums, but never had the heart to throw them out.  My brother and I were two when my parents were finally allowed to go back.  When my grandfather received the telegram, the geraniums started to bloom.  I believe that she is the reason why mine look so beautiful, too.

Because, she knows, that I know, there's more to things, than what meets the eye, and she must really, really like me...too.

That's my story, anyway, and I'm sticking to it!

 

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Comments

[Meeta]

About the African Violet- put it near a window sill, and it may start blooming. The other thing I do is every year I feed my plants a little bit of miracle gro, and it works wonders. If you don't like using miracle gro I'm sure there's other things out there that might work. The dog here doesn't touch my plants so I'm lucky. I also noticed that moving my jasmine plant near the patio door has made it grow and its really healthy right now.

[Cher]

Great list LOL. It would probably be eaiser for me to name 13 things I have destroyed LOL

[Laura]

I've always had trouble with african violets, too...used to have beautiful other plants...couldn't KILL anything, but we moved to Montana, and I couldn't keep anything alive...going to try again in Virginia!

Happy t-13!

[Liz]

I hear you, Cher...hi Meeta and nice to meet you Laura!

Thanks for stopping by and the advice about the violets - unfortunately, there are very few sunny windows in our house and most of those are already taken. Oh, and the cat pees in the violets then, too! But, can't reach it on the table. I feed it fertilizer, once a month, specifically manufactured for African Violets. It also seems to like my frog lamp, though. I keep the lamp on and it loves our eco-friendly light bulbs. So, as you can see, I take better care of it than I do, you know, myself. But, I guess that's about the green it's EVER gonna get.

Hugs,

Liz

[jayedee]

gee! wanna trade houses? maybe all the broken stuff would resurrect if you moved in for a bit! LOL happy tt!

[Bluegrass Mama]

I still have the blow dryer that I took to college in 1976. Then again, I rarely blow dry my hair. I've held onto it because it has a cold air setting that's perfect for blowing up air mattresses.

[Comedy Plus]

I love your sense of humor. Very well done, but I loved the geranium story the best. Excellent read. Have a great TT. :)

[Liz]

Hi Bluegrass Mama,

I blow dry my hair...every...flipping...day....and, HEY, does your...ahem...vintage blow dryer happen to look like this one?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veB52xIc2aY

If so, I had the SAME one and I swear Farah Faucett is saying something OTHER than Schick ;o)

[Nancy Liedel - The Goat Rodeo]

Since I flat murdered my Eureka, I've been thinking about a Dyson. You give me hope.

[Liz]

Hi Nancy!

I can't say ENOUGH nice things, about Mr. Dyson's Opus, that properly express the LOVE I feel for this machine.

My parents gave it to me, right after I finished vacuuming the house, and you would NOT have believed the crap it STILL sucked up, so embarrassing!

Best gift, ever and - unlike anything I've gotten from Kemmore - it IS worth every blessed penny.

My parents were so pleased to see me happy (about anything, really) that they ran out and bought one just like it, too.

Except it's purple and looks way cooler!

[Nicholas]

My wife has a crush on Mr Dyson (from the commercials) so we'll probably end up getting one!

[Daisy]

I have a thriving vegetable garden in the summer, but I can't seem to grow indoor plants worth a darn. I don't have a cat to water them, either. My rabbit did take a bite out of a cactus once...

[Laura]

Liz,

You know I have to comment....you are just too funny! I read this the other day and thought I had commented, apparently I didn't.

At least you have another Laura stopping by now...teehee.

Maybe I need to do the 'broken' things about my husband. He seems to break everything and of course the children.

So you like the Dyson huh? I have read some bad reviews and didn't want to get it. I read that the claims aren't quite accurate, but of course, those are others opinions...hehe.

Take care...We are so windy here in Virginia today that our power went out for about an hour and my sis in law who lives down the street had to call the fire department because her neighbors yard was on fire. Ugh! :)

[Liz]

Hi Laura!

Honestly, I really DO break a lot of stuff and the Dyson has been the one (and only) thing that hasn't given me a lick of trouble!

[knocking on wood until knuckles bleed]

Considering my track record - burning up a motor approx. every 2 years - it SHOULD have died a long time ago.

[Dane Bramage]

I'm glad you still have things that aren't broken. With four hyperactive kids, entropy rules at my house. When something major gets destroyed I figure out how long it will be before the youngest is grown and moved out before deciding if I replace it or wait.

My 67th Thursday Thirteen edition 13 Romantic Tips (from a single man's perspective) is up. Stop by if you get a chance.