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Twilight Moms and the Dads who love them, or NOT.

I began my obsession with Twilight in the Summer of 2007, when my oldest daughter insisted that...YES...it would keep her interest and...OF COURSE...the genre would make an absolutely perfect fit into her summer reading list.

"It's a vampire love story!"

Uh-huh.

So, I read it first to make sure that it was really, you know, appropriate for teen readers and...WHAM...it truly was love at first bite.

[cringe]

Don't worry, Stephenie Meyer writes way gooder than me and has taken a story line that is not really that unique -- like, how love overcomes all obstacles, sort of -- but, presents it in a totally refreshing way.

I'm nearly finished reading the latest in the Twilight Saga, "Breaking Dawn" and my husband, Garth (not his real name) truly believes that at least one member of our family may very well be a vampire, or werewolf.

And it ain't isn't me, either!

[Warning:  this blog post has a pretty scary ending and is NOT recommended reading for the faint of heart - especially, if you are a Dad!]

Okay, can't say as I didn't warn you.

[cracks knuckles]

So, I've been furiously reading through "Pillars of the Earth" (yeah, I'm a little late to the party, I know) in anticipation of my two daughters getting through "Breaking Dawn" in less than a week, respectively.

Yeah, they read THAT FAST!

I, on the other hand, know my limits and wait until the evening, after the seemingly endless chores associated with being a Domestic Goddess are done and the kids are in bed, then I pour myself a glass of whine, curl up into my favorite overstuffed chair and immerse myself into another more fantastic world, literally.

"Want to go upstairs?"

Unfortunately, it also happens to be the only time that I get to spend with my poor husband, Garth (not his real name) without the kids, around, I mean.

"Hmmmm..."

[whispering]

"You know...to bed?"

[turning page]

"Uh-huh...."

An hour later.

"Want to go upstairs?"

[turning page]

"Hmmmm..."

[heavy sigh]

"Nevermind."

My poor, dear, sweet Garth (not his real name) and I are celebrating our 18th wedding anniversary on...um...what day is it...anyway, we've been married to each other long enough to know the value of good timing.

Or, lack there of.

So, last Friday, my two oldest daughters were having a girls night in with their favorite Aunt -- the one who lets them do stuff that, you know, I don't -- and I came home, hoping that I could spend a quiet and relaxing evening with my book my husband.

"Wow, you started dinner!?!?"

He beat me home and lit a few candles, even.

"That's really sweet."

I kissed him, before seeing the funny look on his face and then quickly pulled away.

"What?"

He was smiling, so I guessed it wasn't anything bad.

"Looks like a beaver died in the bathtub!"

I had to beg my oldest daughter to take a shower, this morning -- apparently, summer vacation means never having to take a shower, or brush your teeth again, until September -- and, well, you know.

"Yeah, I already spoke to Thing One about cleaning up after herself!"

[eyes go wide]

"You mean...I thought it was...but, I cleaned the tub...so, that we could...and all that hair...THOSE WERE HERS!"

[gagging]

"Ah, man..."

You see, the night before, he told me how the girls in his office were trying to embarrass him by asking if he...ahem...preferred rugs, or hardwood floors...and thought that I was merely setting the tone for the evening.

"EWWWWWWWWWWW!"

Yep, the sound you just heard was my husband's eyes bursting into flames and me sucking the life out of yet another romantic evening.  Let alone, any chances of Garth (not his real name) finding enjoyment in eating his dinner, anytime soon!

"My work is done, here."

I'm nearly finished with the book now and canNOT wait to see the characters come to life when Twilight hits theaters in November, moved up from its original Christmas holiday time slot, as a result of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, opening in the summer of 2009, instead.

Yeah, Stephenie Meyers is THAT GOOD!

"Tell me, she didn't use my razor!?!?"

I, on the other hand, know when to...you know...stop writing.

----

In Other News:

Are you a Twilight Mom, yet?

Feel free to check out Thing Two's book review of the Twilight Saga on our family blogging project, This Full House Kids.

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