A friend of mine called me yesterday and this is where my father would insist that...NO!...I don't have friends, I just know people AND after having said that would laugh the hardest (yeah, good one, dad!)
Aaaaanyway, her youngest and my youngest are best friends, as of yesterday, as far as I know, anyway (they're 10 year-old girls, enough said.)
"I've been very worried about you."
Long story, short (you're welcome!) she saw our two girls walking together after school and later asked her daughter, "I haven't seen Mrs. Thompson this week, how is she?"
"I can't tell you."
Her mother, as any mother would, wanted to know, you know, why the heck not?
"It's a secret."
She then went on to tell me how she tried explaining to her daughter that keeping secrets between friends is perfectly fine, however, if one of her mom friends was in trouble, or needed help, she would want to know.
Then, she went real quiet on the phone.
"I have a kidney stone."
"Oh thank God!"
Poor thing. She had all sorts of stories going on in her head. Apparently, she even tried to casually bring me up in conversation with another friend of mine, was too polite to ask her straight up and now her own daughter was all like, I know something you don't know.
"I wonder why she thought it was a secret?"
"She says your husband told her not to tell anybody."
I assured her, considering my youngest child's penchant for broadcasting news -- most especially, if it's not her news to tell -- that my husband probably didn't want her to go around arbitrarily shouting it out to anyone and everyone.
"Well, your daughter is pretty good at keeping secrets."
Much later, my husband came home from work, walked into the kitchen and was all, like, "Oooooh, pretty flowers!"
[one beats, two beats]
"Mrs. So-and-So dropped those off for mom!"
See what I mean? What if I wanted to pretend that they were from, oh I don't know, a secret admirer, or something?
"But, you're married, you're not allowed to have secret admirers mom!"
Good to know.
"Yeah, now they're called stalkers."
Okay, alright, so there was this one time, last weekend, when a few of my friends stalked my husband on Facebook.
What? They hadn't heard from me in a while, either. Besides, that's what social media is for, right?!?
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