COMMENTS ARE CLOSED: So happy to be sharing with Kim (comment #1) Enjoy!!!
Having recently entered into my 8th year of blogging (I know, I'm old, shuddup!) I feel it safe to say that I am a living, walking, breathing validation that oversharing can be a good thing (ahem!) as, my ENTIRE blogging platform has been based on learning to accept AND own my imperfection.
It can be REAL hard work making other mothers look good, you know?
All kidding aside (mostly) I believe that most moms (like me) pretty much know that perfection is highly overrated (right, RIGHT?) but, can we really let go of who we (or others) think we should be, without feeling inadequate, or even powerless?
I have the extreme pleasure of being the first stop on the TLC Book Tour for October, 2010 featuring The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown.
Aaaand, I don't JUST mean housework or laundry...either.
No matter how hard I try (to be a good mother, wife, sister, friend, whatever) or how many "how-to" books I collect (the pile, she is BIG) there always seems to be this unseen evil force that is obviously out to get me.
Because, it canNOT just be ALL my fault, right?
[sound of crickets chirping]
Riiiiight.
In her book, The Gifts of Imperfection
It's going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid but that doesn't change the truth that I am worthy of love and belonging.
No, there is no quick fix (DAMMIT!) and you won't find any how-to's here, either (ditto!) rather, this book is more about how-not to allow stuff to get in your way of living a more authentic life.
For example, my FAVORITE chapter, or Guidepost #7 (love that!) Cultivating Play and Rest - Letting To of Exhaustion as a Status Symbol and Productivity as Self-Worth:
We are a nation of exhausted and overstressed adults raising over-scheduled children. We use our spare time to desperately search for joy and meaning in our lives. We think accomplishments and acquisitions will bring joy and meaning, but that pursuit could be the very thing that's keeping us so tired and afraid to slow down.
It's true; especially, for us moms. I mean, we ALL know how busy we each are...right...but, do we really need to start EVERY conversation, telling everyone, or have every other person feel the need to, you know, tell us how busy we SHOULD be?
According to the author, perhaps it's a matter of caring about how my house looks, or how high the laundry pile gets, a little too much, or, at least, more than other people do.
[slaps forehead]
However, not once did I feel as if the author was being preachy, or (IMO) does she come off as self-righteous. In fact, just the opposite. She has her own feelings of failure:
Like most women, I struggle with body image, self-confidence, and the always-complicated relationship between food and emotions.
Brené Brown is a research professor and a trained observer of human behavior (i.e., people watcher) but, she also has this great way of helping her readers look at things in a new and refreshingly positive way:
Perfectionism self-talk: "Ugh. Nothing fits. I'm fat and ugly. I'm ashamed of how I look. I need to be different than I am right now to be worthy of love and belonging."
Healthy-striving self-talk: "I want this for me. I want to feel better and be healthier. The scale doesn't dictate if I'm loved and accepted. if I believe that I'm worthy of love and respect now, I will invite courage, compassion, and connection into my life. I want to figure this out for me. I can do this."
See what I mean?
[kicks scale to the curb]
FINAL VERDICT: Courage, compassion and connection, according to the author, are The Gifts of Imperfection and not only did I find this book extremely entertaining (she's got a light-hear ted sense of humor and I like that!) but, I also thought that the ideals presented behind wholehearted living were pretty much attainable, by everyone, too.
I would highly recommend this book to every high school/college student, mother-to-be, CEO, CFO, or even a professional dork (AM SO!) like me.
Want one?
The publisher has kindly offered to send one (1) of our U.S. and Canadian online friends a copy of The Gifts of Imperfection to keep at your house, as well.
Because, we roll like that.
LINKY LOVE BYTES:
Brené Brown's website: http://www.brenebrown.com/
Brené on Twitter: http://twitter.com/brenebrown
GET IT HERE: To enter, please leave a comment, like, if you've ever wrestled with or had bouts of imperfection (Yep, every day!) along with a valid email address on this post by 10:00 a.m. on Monday, October 11th and you're automatically entered to win. One (1) winner will be picked (via random.org) and announced via email and posted on My Prizey Giveaways Page!
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© 2010 This Full House / This Full House Gone Shopping
The Small Gray-ish Print: No payment, or consideration, besides a sample of the product and a chance to share stuff we like with online friends, was received for this blog post -- the words, however, are ALL mine!
