My husband and I grew up with dogs, but decided to wait to get one until our youngest rugrat was out of diapers. We did the research, asked our family and friends, and finally attempted to adopt a beautiful basset hound through animal rescue, which turned out to be a disappointing experience that left our kids heart-broken.

Not that we're bitter (MUCH!) but, we decided to try our hand at finding our family's first pet through our local animal shelter.

Though believing that investing in "a breed" would be best and having family and friends owning a lhasa-schnoodle-doodle-poo-something-or-another, our economic situation led us on a more...um...mutt-led path.

We got ourselves a doofus-dog!

No, really - I mean the dog is so dumb, he'd be standing right beside you, turn to leave the room, forget there was a wall there, and bonk his head...each...and...every time...earning him the nickname, Pinhead!

[sitting at front door]

"Doofus...dinnertime!"

[turning too quickly]

BONK!

"Pinhead!"

Don't get me wrong, he is lovable (and has never, ever suggested otherwise, as evidenced above) and that's the rub.

Oh, yeah - here's another thing, the dog thinks he's...a cat!

Every night, doofus-dog tries to curl up on my lap and does that, you know, kneading dough (or in my case, muffin top) thingie with his paws.

[roll it, pat it]

AIEEEEE!

"Knock it off, Pinhead!"

Can you imagine going through cabin fever with a 90 lb. doofus-dog?

Me either - so, I took him along with me and the kids to the park on Saturday because, you know, the sun was shining. A dad spotted me walking doofus-dog next to the playground and just far enough away from the woodchips because, you know, if it doesn't walk, he'll eat it.

"Is that a lab?"

[looking down]

"Mostly."

[frowns]

"Oh, I only asked because we have a 1-year-old lab at home and, well, he's just such a nutty dog, you know, that we're seriously thinking about getting rid of him."

Oh, the things I could have told him.

Spending months cleaning up garbage, picking up tons of (yes, that many) torn-up pieces of paper, tissues and used feminine products (EWWW!) not to mention spackling holes in the wall, he wanted me to tell him whether or not, you know, owning a doofus really worth it!?!

.

Yes, I believe he is - today, anyway.

Life is like a box of chocolate labs, you never know what you're gonna get - unless you adopt a doofus-dog!