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September 2011

August 2011

Easy, Breezy, Pinot Gris-y

In between earthquakes and hurricane warnings (what a week we're having, Jersey, eh?) my husband, Garth (NHRN) and I celebrated our 21st wedding anniversary and had an awesome dinner with my in-laws, last night!

I tried to keep the conversation light (thanks to 2 Mojitos and an awesome glass of Pinot Gris) alas, my husband's boyscout powers, along with the category 2 hurricane and extreme flood warnings, had been activated early in the day.

"You guys have everything you need?"

My in-laws are both in their 80's (but, you STILL look good Mom!) and, well, let's just say that they didn't seem very worried about the weather.

"Ah-yup."

Still, I told them that the kids and I were going to go down to check on my folks (they live about 15 miles inland from Seaside Heights) then, I would stop by their house (my in-laws live about 10 minutes away from us) to help secure stuff and drop off a case of bottled water.

"I don't expect there'd be a problem."

My father-in-law is from New England, enough said.

"But, you want to be able to have coffee!"

I mean, seriously, you really have to wonder about some people's priorities.

"Category 2 hurricane and you're worried about coffee?"

I'm sure the table behind us MUST have heard the muscles in my neck snap, as I whipped my head in my husband's direction (I mean, my neck STILL hurts a little) seriously, he's lived with me for 21 years.

"Maybe coffee would help make them worry about it, you know, less."

Okay, at this point, I realize that it sounded as if I was being beaten by the stoopid stick. 

It's not every day you experience an earthquake AND a hurricane in the same week.

I stood my ground.

"This way, you have water, all you have to do is just fire up your Keurig and you're good to go."

Wait for it.

"That's actually a great idea.

Wait.  For.  It.

"Iffffffff, they had electricity!"

AHEM.

"How about those Giants?"

[blink, blink]

"They're actually going to go ahead and play the Jets."

[sound of crickets]

"You know, on Saturday?!?"

[heavy sigh]

"Sure, I'll have another glass of wine, thanks!"

All I'm saying is, thank goodness, I married a boyscout....stupid Irene!

© 2003 - 2011 This Full House

© This Full House 2003-2017. All rights reserved.

I Felt the Earth Move Under My Buttocks

As you may (or, may not) have heard (or, even care, considering other more important stuff, like, oh, I don't know, preparing for a hurricane, or something) we had a bit of excitement the other day when the earth "Pfffftttt" here in Jersey.

All east coast jokes aside (seriously, I'm from Jersey, we're used to it) what I can tell you is this, I was already sitting on the floor and did NOT panic (at first) thinking:

a) I was helping the girls clean out their closet and, well, it's a lot like playing Jenga, only different.

b) The washing machine was running at the time and I may (or, may not) have overloaded the sucker (again!)

c) A truck busted open that stupid sink hole down the street, or the watermain broke (or, both!)

d) Our house is old, it farts (a lot!)

Until, I saw my oldest girl's eyes go wide (LIKE THIS!) and watched one of their cubbies shimmy, back and forth, like J-Lo (in slow motion) did I feel the floor ripple under me.

PANIC!!!!!

All west coast sensibilities, aside (seriously, I get it!) the rest of the kids and I met in the living room and it wasn't because we thought it was an earthquake, at first.

"Is the house falling down?"

It is at this very moment, when I realized, that ALL those years of my joking about the house...falling down around our ears...pretty much bit me right in the buttocks.

Literally AND figuratively speaking, dagnabit.

P.S.  Many thanks to all my west coast friends on Facebook and Twitter for their patience in helping me explain to my kids how the earth typically doesn't, "Pfffftttt," like that, here in Jersey.

P.P.S.  My 10 year-old finally DID manage to put her feet down on the floor, rather than walk her way around the house, on top of the furniture.

P.P.P.S.  Yo, Irene...BITE ME!!!

© 2003 - 2011 This Full House

Freshly-brewed elsewhere:  Allstate Good Hands Roadside Assistance Program Recap where I get to share a $50 Amazon gift card.  Also, had fun filming this video with the Minute Clinic folks at BlogHer.

© This Full House 2003-2017. All rights reserved.

Fanny Body Asks, I'm NOT Home!

TFH Fortress of DorkitudeKnock-knock.  Who's there?  Fanny.  Fanny who? (see blog post title) SNORT!

The kids helped me out with a little blogging project and, since it's been raining cats and dogs, since, like, forever, they built this awesome tent in the  middle of our livingroom.

Not that it's earth-shattering news, or an epiphany in parenting, that will perhaps, one day, save the world, by any means, or anything.

It's just that, you know, my kids are older AND by older I mean:  a) oldest is graduating high school this year and b) youngest is moving up to middle school next year (SOB!)

The fact that they still like doing this sort of stuff...with me...well, sort of just blows me away, a little.

You see, I am not the best mom, or expert at anything other than being a dork (I get that!) but, raising teens is REAL hard.

Aaaaand, some would be hardpressed to argue that first part, as well (DAMNIT!) but, these are my kids and, some day, REAL soon, maybe they won't be home long enough, or even want to admit that, you know, we actually had fun...together.

Except, this one day, when we built a tent, out of blankets, in the middle of our living room, microwaved us some S'mores and watched Toy Story 3.

Aaaaand, it was AWESOME!

Racy Mushrooms

"Holy crap on a stick, look at the size of those mushrooms!"

Told you it's been raining, A LOT!!!

"Heeeeey, you know what, they sorta look [snicker] you know [cough, cough] kinda, I dunno, funny-looking, right?!?"

After some scolding and a quick lecture on the appropriateness of this particular conversation, my kids finally allowed me back into the house and sent me and my inner-12-year-old straight to my room, for some quiet time.

Aaaaand, it was AWESOME!

© 2003 - 2011 This Full House

Freshly-brewed elsewhere:  Allstate Good Hands Roadside Assistance Program Recap where I get to share a $50 Amazon gift card.  Also, had fun filming this video with the Minute Clinic folks at BlogHer.

© This Full House 2003-2017. All rights reserved.

The Husband Wish List

I was collating through paperwork and alphabetizing color-coded files, the other day.

Okay, so I was looking for a pen.

Fiiiiiine, I would have been happy finding a broken crayon...but, couldn't see the top of my desk from the paper jungle that mysteriously cropped up...seems like overnight, really.

Husband Wish ListAlriiiiiight, so a person could lose a small child in the stack of bills, that somehow magically migrated from the kitchen table...ummmmmm...what?

[sound of crickets]

PEN!!!...that's right...I was looking for a pen (or crayon) but, found a list of stuff and asked my youngest daughter about it, since, you know, it was in her handwriting.

"It's a list of stuff."

Now that we're clear on it being a list...of stuff...she went on to explain that it is actually a collective wish list she and her sisters penned, while I was away at BlogHer, of the qualities they wanted in their future husband and/or SigOth.

In the order listed (with notes added, where deemed necessary, or, at least, I felt, you know, compelled to do so, as their Muh-thuh) and YES! I asked them before I blogged it, for the sake of posterity, of course:

  • Funny (Heh, guys hate this, right?!?)
  • Loving
  • Caring
  • Good attitude
  • Wants to have kids (Really? Hrmph. Go figure.)
  • Tall
  • A Little Older (My oldest has a little crush on the "Stay Thirsty, My Friends," dude, me too!)
  • Australian (With the likes of Hugh Jackman, can you blame them?)
  • Any accent (Come to think of it...Mike Holmes...aye?!?)
  • Great personality
  • Hugger (It's how we roll!)
  • Dancer/singer/male model/body building (I kid you not, with forward slash and everything!)
  • Lots of money (I guess they thought better about it!)
  • Helps read to children (Preferably can read on their own, too, I hope!)
  • Nice abs (SNORT!)
  • Love to bake and cook
  • Pretty eyes (It's what attracted me to their father, that and his nice abs, really!)
  • Toned (Because, sometimes nice abs are just not enough, you know?)
  • Good teeth (Or, at least, hope that one of your sisters or brother marries a dentist!)
  • Animal lover
  • Smooth voice (Why, yes, I do happen to own a collection of Barry White albums, why do you ask?)
  • Artistic
  • Sporty
  • Bond with the kids
  • Strong

[pause for bathroom break]

  • Willing to take responsibility and take care of family when sick
  • Photographer
  • Traveler (Aaaaand, hopefully, take you with him, just sayin')
  • Some chest hair (SNORT!)
  • Whiskers (Less cat-like and more of the Johnny Depp-ish, I think!)
  • Confident
  • Flirty (Smart girls!)
  • Loves me for me (Word!)
  • Doesn't smoke or do drugs (See previous parenthesis.)
  • Loves the beach/the ocean/the capes (i.e. Cape Cod and Cape May.)
  • Construction worker (To build his/her mother-in-law her dream house, FINALLY, preferably on either one of the Capes, doesn't matter which, really, I'm easy like that!)

It will be fun to visit this list, a few years from now and see how we they fared (or, not!) right?!?

Riiiiiiight.

© 2003 - 2011 This Full House

© This Full House 2003-2017. All rights reserved.

So, Yeah, My Kids FINALLY Got Their Supply Lists...from Hogwarts?!?

It's the same thing, every summer, about this time, the kids shake down our mail carrier, desperately awaiting news of their teachers and classes for the new school year.

So, when I heard the SLAM! of our mailbox (our new carrier seems to be a wee bit crankier than usual, I don't blame him) and then Hope's feet running for the front door (she walks/runs like her muh-thuh!) I was hoping that the wait would be over...FINALLY!

[SLAM!...SQUEEEEE!]

I felt it safe to assume that...yep...they got their back-to-school letters.

"It's from....Hogwarts?!?"

Hope Gets Her Letter!

They each received a personalized letter, addressed to The Brown House With the Star, sealed with wax and, well, really?!?

Hogwarts Letter

Yes, they looked really, really, um, real and, honestly, as self-proclaimed Potterheads, we ALL experienced a little pang of regret...okay, mostly me.

Hogwarts Supply List
My youngest is graduating from elementary school, this year (SOB!) and has spent nearly her whole life, growing up, right here, on this little blog.

"Wow, I'm as old as the first Harry Potter movie?!?"

Aaaand, well, it's nice to be able to at least pretend like it was September, 2003, when being a mom, who happenend to have this thing, called a weblog, seemed a whole lot easier.

D'oh, alright, fiiiiiiine.

I'll even take 2006 (around the time I blew up my blog and lost 2 years worth of stuff...UGH!) just to be able to blog about all the things I should have (or, maybe shouldn't have) all over again.

"Wonder who sent it?!?"

Me, too!

"Hey, you think maybe J.K. Rowling reads your blog?!?"

So, I can send them the bill...you know...for all the therapy this poor kid is gonna need, you know?!?

© 2003 - 2011 This Full House 

© This Full House 2003-2017. All rights reserved.

I Left My (insert body part, here)
In San Diego

BlogHer 2011 Headless Mom and Me  Toasting a safe arrival into San Diego with my dear friend, Headless Mom!

I had the extreme privilege of attending BlogHer 2011 (thank you, Kmart!) and honestly, even after pulling all-nighters in a New York City hospital, saving BlogHers with Busy Mom, I don't remember being THIS tired, last year.

BlogHer 2011 Biking Around in Coronado 

Then again, biking around in Coronado with Melisa, Sue and Michelle can be very, very EXHAUSTING oh and absolutely HILARIOUS (trust me, I was there!) but, I'll let Melisa blog about it, once she stops laughing, I mean!

UPDATED TO ADD:  Which, she did, right here.

BlogHer 2011 Clever Girls Party Gals Left to right:  Me (Michelle, in back) Christina (Headless Mom in back) Jenn (Busy Mom in back) Melisa and  Carmen (don't her arms look great?!?)

It's REAL hard work, you know, keeping up with the cardigans (dang, but it was chilly) and my Clever Girls Party sistahs.

BlogHer 2011 Me and Melisa at Clever Girls Party

After all, seeing as this is my 5th BlogHer, I feel it safe to say that networking is, you know, REAL hard work!

Liz and Silvia of Mama Latina Tips

Seriously, being this gosh-darned cute AND huggable, every time (MamaLatina Tips, not me, DER!)

BlogHer 2011 Jenn, Me and Busy MomCourtesy of Elizabeth @Table4Five

Attending sessions, learning from other bloggers and celebrating each other's accomplishments, like, that of the awesomeness of my dear friends, Jenn and Busy Mom (pictured above) speaking on the Old School Blogger Panel, is what we blogger-types do best.

Liz Team Pic at Pan Am Party
Also, meeting bloggers I admire (like Elizabeth Peterson and the amazing Liz Strauss) for the first time at really cool events, like here, attending the Pan Am dinner with Busy Mom.

BlogHer 2011

Getting all decked out for the absolutely awesome harbor cruise, courtesy of Dove Ice Cream (thanks for sending me this before pic, Melisa!) and checking off yet another once in a lifetime moment, thanks to writing in my silly little blog.

Photobombed by Busy Mom
Aaaaaand, oh how we danced and laughed whenever one of us got photo-bombed by BusyMom (I did and it was AWESOME!) these are the BlogHer moments I love best.

Getting caught talking with my hands (again!) and spilling my drink all over Backpacking Dad, not so much.

[covers face with hands, hangs head in shame]

Thank goodness no one else at CheeseburgHER seems to have noticed, or even cared, that he smelled of appletini (heh!) 

At least, I don't think they did, seeing as I was too busy throwing my back out on the dance floor...YO!

Oh, and I seemed to have left my ass on Coronado.

Can't WAIT to see what happens, next year!

© 2003 - 2011 This Full House

© This Full House 2003-2017. All rights reserved.