Last winter, you may or may not remember my telling you about the house next door.

Miss Grace turned 103, this month (bless her hearty little, uhh, heart) so, about 2 weeks ago, I pulled into my driveway and saw our other neighbor cutting her grass.

DANGIT!

The 3 of us have very large properties (as in, DANG, but this grass got real long, didn't it?!?)

I don't remember the EXACT measurement (that particular brain cell burned off about 2 kids ago, I think) but, I'm pretty sure we're about 300+ feet long, backdoor to end of mow-able backyard and, well, that's A LOT of grass clippings, my friend.

Our riding mower is broken (of course!) and I can't very well sit by and watch our other neighbor, who works the night shift and coaches in the afternoons, cut Miss Grace's lawn when he could be, you know, sleeping.

But, the self-propelled portion of our lawn mower is ALSO broken (I know, go ahead and act surprised anyway) making it more a non-moving lawn mower (as in, DANG, but Miss Grace has got a lot of shrubs, doesn't she?!?)

I don't remember the EXACT moment (after 4 tours of potty-training duty, I'm pretty much thankful for even a small fraction of brain activity) but, I'm pretty sure it was AFTER cutting underneath her holly tree.

3 things came to mind:

1.  Poison ivy lives here.

2.  Miss Grace is NOT allergic to poison ivy.

3.  I am SEVERELY allergic to poison ivy.

No worries.  I've done this before (sadly) and know EXACTLY what to do:

1.  Take a shower, IMMEDIATELY!

2.  Dry off, COMPLETELY!

3.  Wash infected clothes and any towels used, SEPARATELY!

Besides, Karma dictates I should be fine (no?)

HAH!  Made you itch!!!

So, here I am, 2 weeks later, fresh from the doctor's office, thinking I was suffering from some sort of horrible contagion, with a prescription of prednisone (it makes my brain itch, like crazy) just so you know:

3. (REVISED) Wash infected clothes and any towels used SEPARATELY and IN HOT WATER!

Next week:  I'm ripping out her holly tree and planting a dogwood (shhhh, but don't tell her, okay?) after I borrow a HAZMAT suit, of course.

STUPID poison ivy, DUMBASS Karma!

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