My husband, the kids and I were ALL having a nice, quiet, leisurely dinner at the dining room table the other night.

[blank stare]

Okaaaaay, so, maybe the kids weren't actually at the table.

[eyes go wide]

Fiiiiiiine, they were all out eating at other people's houses.

[taps foot]

Buuuuut, my husband and I were eating...uh...standing up.

[sound of crickets chirping]

Aaaaanyway, my husband was in the middle of telling me a story about something that happened at his work the other day and then ended it, very abruptly.

"What's the face for?"

[blink, blink]

Honestly, I wasn't even aware of my giving a face.

"Which face?" 

I can't help it.  Part of it stems from my being raised by Hungarians, a culture whose emotional heritability increases exponentially.

"THAT FACE, right there!"

Seems some of the kids were home...early...and immediately began to throw their mother (that would be me) right under the proverbial bus.  Apparently, I have six (6) distinct faces, which they then began to categorize, thusly:

 
A = Awesome:  For those moments of pure joy and one that I would hope most folks are probably pretty much used to seeing, right?  RIGHT?  Riiiiight.

B = Be Quiet:  One I use when fighting my inner-12-year-old or trying REAL HARD to keep my mouth shut (shuddup!)

C = Catatonic:  Believe it or not, this is one of my least expressive faces which, come to find out, is a clear sign that I am NOT listening.

D = DER!:  I've got teenagers, enough said.

E = EWW:  My most multi-functional expression and can be easily translated from,"What's that smell?!?" to "Meh, I've seen hairier!"

F = Fear Me:  Thankfully, I don't use this one very often (DO NOT!) but, one my kids, my husband, the dog and whoever else manages to bring out the Jersey in me (YO!) fear the most.

Oh, and jackwagons  who insist on double-parking in the drop-off lane, THIS is the one you'll most likely see from your review mirror, complete with its own personalized set of eye baggage and everything!

You feel me?

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