The Year Without An Easter Bunny
Growing up, our family consisted of me, my twin brother, my parents, my maternal grandmother and my Aunt Theresa (the rest of our extended family lived overseas) so, yes, celebrating holidays, like Easter was a very big deal.
We would wait for my father to come home from working at the garden center (Easter flowers were pretty big in the stone ages too, believe it or not) only then would we carve into the Easter ham or (in my brother's case) dive into some Hungarian smoked sausage and crack open a couple of Easter eggs dyed by boiling them in onion skins (red, white, yellow, etc...) on Good Friday.
If we weren't full from our Easter baskets, that is: their remains at the foot of our bunk bed still visible from the kitchen table.
My parents always joked about how lucky we were (okay, half-jokingly) because, the Easter Bunny never could quite make it as far as Eastern Europe.
Their grand kids, however, are very familiar with the Easter Bunny and it was fun to watch their faces light up and my son's eyeballs cross...each and every year.
Then, all of a sudden, it started to get...you know...less fun. By 2008, I had a few choice nicknames for the furry little leporidae and was posting stuff on my blog like:
Either the Easter Bunny's getting really, really lazy, or they were running low on Easter supplies at ALL the bunny markets, or maybe a little of both...damnit!"
So, my husband Garth (not his real name) took over Easter Bunny duties the following year and has effectively sent the kids' dentist/orthodontist on a lovely little vacation for the last couple of years and we did not get even one post card...damnit.
Still, I kept telling myself...SELF!...chillax...because, one day, you're gonna miss ALL of this.
"I know about the Easter Bunny."
[eyes go wide]
"What about the Easter Bunny?"
My youngest is ten. She is also the youngest of four. Enough said. Her sisters and brother have done a really good job at keeping their membership in the "I know about the Easter Bunny" club...private.
I'm not quite sure if I am ready to admit that...you know...I know about the Easter Bunny, too.
"You know, like the thing about Santa Claus?"
Uh, yeah, about him too (UGH!) sorry, but I've got a kid graduating high school, another one asking about driving lessons and two more in high school by the time the first one is ready to graduate college (I think!) things are moving JUST SO GOSH-DARNED FAST!!!!
"What thing about Santa Claus?"
Can you really blame me for wanting to keep this one little, for just a little while longer?
"You don't need to get me any chocolates or anything."
[one beat, two beats]
"I mean, if you really don't want to."
So, I picked her up a couple of cute hair clips and some tubes of lip gloss instead...shhhh, don't tell her....oh, and peeps...I mean, you are NEVER too old for peeps, am I right?!?
"I can't wait to dye eggs with Mama on Friday!"
[grin]
"Me, either!"
My parents aren't in a very good place, at the moment. My mom got some unwanted news this week. I ran down there after dropping my oldest off at work one night (she's already worked 4 days, so I don't exactly remember, you know, which one) suffice it to say that both are striving to become The Bionic Grandparents.
"We're still sleeping over, right?"
I thought it would be a good idea to leave some of my kids behind (temporarily, of course!) to help distract their grandparents and put them in...you know...a happier place.
I hear grand kids are pretty good at that.
"Aaaand, we're still having ham for Easter...right momma?"
[eyes go wide]
"Um, what Easter ham?"
Stupid holidaze, dumbass Easter Bunny!
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