Garth and the Amazing Technicolor Dream House
Garth (not his real name) and I have been planning to paint our house for a long while, however, like most of our DIY projects (see also: all of them), preparing for one thing...leads to eleven more unplanned projects...which need to be addressed, first...before we can even begin thinking about starting on...ummmmm...wait, what WERE we talking about, again?
[blows bangs out of eyes, looks down at hands, picks at chipped fingernail polish]
OH YEAH! Painting the house. Right. So, it doesn't help that one of us is more of a...let's just sit back and wait...perhaps think about this a little more, rationally...type person. While the other one of us is all...ohhhhhhhh, let's just throw caution to the wind and get'r done, already...DAMMIT!!!
Guess which one of us is which. Go ahead. I'll wait.
[taps foot, counts one Mississippi, two Mississippi]
IT'S ME!!! I am so NOT a good sit back and just wait-er.
Loooong...boooooring...even more convoluted than usual...story short...we're to the point where we HAVE to paint the house and, well, Garth (not his real name) had some scheduled time off, last week...sooooo, PERFECT TIMING!!!...besides, we've been prepping for this moment for a very looooong...well...hang on...let me show you.
We were leaning towards the second color from the left. Some sort of Sante Fe terra cotta, I think. Then our parents got sick. My parents moved. Brother gets married, invites all 6 of us to be in the wedding party. And then "Maybe next year" turned into "Meh...the house doesn't look THAT bad, right?!?"
Actually, you can't see the color, not anymore. It was a lovely barn red, but my husband HATED IT and covered it with our newest selections.
5 years later...I have to agree with him...ICK!!! So, he sent me to Home Depot with the following instructions: pick 3 of your favorite colors (see pic above the blood red) and then we'll just eenie-meenie-minee-moe-it!
After a week of prepping the house for painting...for real...Garth (not his real name) completed the garage-side of the house, thinking we could let it set overnight and THEN decide if we really, really like it.
Aaaaand, then it rained...and rained...and I'm all like...MOTHEREFFER!!!...meh, I've waited THIS long, what's another couple of days...or twenty more...right?!? RIGHT?!?
[sound of crickets, chirping]
One could ONLY dream. Besides, at this rate, we could simply continue testing color combinations and have the house painted in...[does the math]...another 30 years...give or take a high school graduation...yo!
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