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October 2016

Eggs Are Stupid, Let's Throw Husbands At Them!

My husband, Garth (not his real name) and I have been married for...uhhhhhh...okay, so we've been married for nearly...ummmmm...a lot of years, however, we still sometimes experience ah-HAH moments, you know, liiiiiike enjoying a quiet morning walk before work, while I try and figure out my travel schedule and my husband goes through our meal plan for the week, and...whoa...we're both all...maaaaan, but how our lives have changed, eh?

My husband has taken over a lot of the cooking and it's not like I don't know HOW to cook (been doing it since I was 10!), now I just sometimes forget.

"You want me to hard boil some eggs for breakfast?"

Two of our kids are home sick and, trust me, I know that they're old enough to take care of themselves, NO DOUBT, but I was raised by a Hungarian Grandmother (and Mother), who...at the first cough or sniffle...would break out their mental list of old world remedies, half of which my kids should be VERY happy I've forgotten about.

"Des, pleabe!"

I put up a pot of water to boil and then grab an entire dozen...of eggs...because there are half-a-dozen of us currently living here AND my kids have mastered the art of sharing...especially, viruses!!!...and then I break out my fool-proof hard boiled egg recipe:

  • Put eggs into a pot of water
  • Bring eggs to boil
  • Remove pot from heat
  • Cover and let the eggs sit for twenty minutes

"There's a trick to peeling these, watch!"

I grab the pot to show my middle girl the trick to peeling hard boiled eggs, and then my husband walks into the kitchen.

"You know, there's a trick to peeling those..."

Here's the thing.

"YES! I KNOW THE TRICK!"

The thing is, I know my husband has been doing A LOT of the cooking, and the food shopping, and the everything else-ing that I used to do, and yes, I am blessed he wants to help...BLESSED!...but I already KNOW the trick to peeling hard boiled eggs!

"Empty the water, cover the pot, and shake the eggs around, like this!"

And it WOULD have worked, if I had remembered to set the timer.

Fool-boiled eggs
Aaaaaand, THIS is what hard boiled eggs are NOT supposed to look like!

*DROPS MIC*

The end.

© This Full House 2003-2017. All rights reserved.

Why Did I Let My Kid Shred My Hair?

Our youngest cut her own hair when she was 3 years-old (the only one of our four to ever do that, by the way), because being the youngest can be really hard, you know? Unless you have (and know how to rock) a pair of pink cowgirl boots, of course! 

Garth (not his real name) and I have always tried really hard to help our kids cultivate their own sense of style (i.e., point them toward the clearance racks and just get out of their way), however, Hope had fully-grasped her sense of...um...uniqueness at a very young age.

3693478723_91f2806c5f_b

Still, it's hard to be the youngest, feeling like you're constantly following along in someone else's footsteps can be a bit lonely, even in a houseful, sometimes. Our baby girl has gone through many transformations in her 15 years of being...ummmm...Hope.

Her Goth stage was the most...errrrr...interesting...and don't EVEN think about bringing up her shockingly pink hair...because, well, it's just not shocking enough, anymore, DANGIT!

"LORT?!? Why did you EVER let me wear my hair like that?!?"

As if I ever had a choice. Hope has always been a free spirit = she is my hippy-child. Still, it's real difficult for her to NOT allow her free-thinking to feed into all the draaaah-maaaah and, well, YOU COULDN'T PAY ME ENOUGH TO BE FIFTEEN, AGAIN or GO BACK TO HIGH SCHOOL, am I right?!?!

Hope

After 20+ years of parenting, I feel it safe to say that self-esteem issues are best cultivated when you try to look like everyone else. And I may have mentioned this to my kids, once or twenty times, every day, especially to my girls.

Still, behind all the selfies and Snapchat filters, you can't hide the fact that growing up female is complicated enough (why IS this STILL happening?!?), especially when you're a Mom.

On the one hand, we preach self-esteem to our children, and on the other hand, our own confidence eludes us, the moment we see it in someone else. Why IS that?!?

On the OTHER other hand, intellectually, most of us already understand it to be a defense mechanism...LORT!!!...how we women compare ourselves to each other...eh?

"And I am in desperate need of a haircut!"

Hope aspires to be a hair and makeup artist and, well, somehow she doesn't believe that my husband and I think it's a worthy-enough profession, because teenagers tend to put words into their parents' mouths and they really do think the silliest thoughts, sometimes.

Hair  by Hope

"I love the idea of helping other women feel good about how they look AND maybe feel a little better about themselves and myself, too!" ~ Hope

And that's why I let my kid cut my hair.

The end.

P.S. It's actually "shred" not "cut" and I stand (I mean, sit) corrected, yo!

© This Full House 2003-2017. All rights reserved.